If she has been imported you should approach her calmly. Sounds like you’re in for a bumpy road.
It’s a good thing you had her wings clipped, but in the future you should not be doing anymore grooming. This will lessen the strain on your relationship with her.
I would start by offering her foods she finds irresistible. Food is a great way to gain her trust and works wonders. Keep in mind, if she was in fact caught, she views humans as monsters. Remember, they caged her and took her away from everything she knew—it’s now time to start over.
Daily, and I do mean daily, sit and read nursery rhymes to her. Talk in a soft and soothing voice. Do this until she no longer fears your presence. A clam African grey will preen, eat, and climb.
If you feel your grey is nervous when you get close to the cage, then take a few steps back or sit across the room while you talk to her. Each day move closer and closer until you can go about your business without a reaction of fear. A nervous grey might hiss and flutter around her cage. Watch for these signs and don’t over do it. Right now you are just trying to let her know that living with you has many benefits—a nice person, food, and security.
After you are confident and SURE she is accepting your presence, open the cage door slowly and back away. Don’t stand and watch her try to get out, but go about your business. Curiosity will get the best of her and she’ll start to explore her world outside her cage. This is good. A night she should return, which then you can close the door.
If she does not return, wait till the night and take a towel and gently place her back into her cage. There should be very little struggle if the lights are out and you should do it very slowly and calmly. Remember, the key is to let her know that she will always be safe. If she grabs the top cage bars firmly, don’t pull her, but gently undo each finger.
As time progress she’ll start to want to interact with you. Be ready and confident. Start working with her by offering a dowel to teach her to step up. (Don’t use your hand. As confident as I am, I sometimes fear the beak of a larger parrot.)
After she has mastered the step ups on the dowel, walk with her a few feet away from the cage while she is on the dowel. Repeat this and push her further and further. The key here is baby steps.
Before you attempt anything with her, think about each step logically and take baby steps. Never force her to do anything she does not want do. If you are patient and work with her—she should come around. And no rush, you have at least 60 or more years to work with her.
Don’t feel like it’s impossible to tame her either. Remember, before parrots were even handfed, they were imported and made good pets too.
Also, my grey was handfed; however, I got him from petco. They choose not to handle him for the first six months of his life so he was not socialized. The poor gray only knew his cage and some food. Thankfully I got him before he matured. He now has a large vocabulary and is very friendly. My situation is much different than yours if yours has been trapped.
Hope this help you better understand your grey too! Work with her for they are marvelous pets!
A few tips.
Always whiste before you enter the room so she know you are entering.
Never look her straight in the eyes.
Take a deep breath before you deal with her.
Move slowly around her cage.
Best wishes,
Imran Chaudhry