Hands off my birds please!

[Amandastander]

I have an iritating problem with house guests overstepping the line when it comes to my IRN's. Why don't they understand the simple please leave the birds alone!? Trying to touch them even after I tell them to leave them alone, even invading my babies privacy by sticking their hands insode the cages to bother them. I have a firm believe that if you interact with a bird, if the bird wants your affections, he or she will react favourably, I don't believe in pestering them, if and when they want my love they come to me for it, or start chatting away. Then you get adults ans kids alike who pester them right off their cages and then proceed to chase them around! For goodness sakes!!!! Stomping feet at them etc! Should I have a sign wich reads: if you bother the birds you're out the door or something? It really pisses me off to have my birds go through this

[ellieelectrons]

Interesting.... we have the opposite problem... we want to socialise our birds with people more but most of those who come over aren't that interested.

I guess you need to try to explain to people how to interact with them and show them how to do it?

Ellie.

[nalukaikamahine]

Interesting.... we have the opposite problem... we want to socialise our birds with people more but most of those who come over aren't that interested.

I guess you need to try to explain to people how to interact with them and show them how to do it?

Ellie.

Exactly!

My IRN is a brat because I'm the only one who handles him, my hubs isn't interested so the only socialization he gets is from myself, and my dogs...

I wish people would come over to my house and bother my IRN. Lol. If you kick your house guests out, send them my way!

[MissK]

Actually, I may be the only one with this opinion, but I think it boils down to this:

If the people cannot respect your wishes in your own home, you do not need to invite them back.

I think the humane treatment of your dependent, captive animals may be more important than, for instance, not juggling your fine china, but at the heart of this issue is the fact that the guest is overstepping their bounds. If they cannot be corrected with some firm but gentle conversation, they should not be there.

I would not eject them from the house unless the incident were so bad you no longer wanted them as friends. You might, however, take the bird from them, lock it up, and lead them by the hand away from the cage. However, in the future, if they ask why they are not invited, you can plainly tell them you'd love to meet them elsewhere, but their presence in your home upsets your pets.

You have to be strong to do this, and you have to make the choice which is more important to you. The other option is to sequester the bird in a locked room when guests visit.

Best wishes,
-MissK

[Skyes_crew]

Wow!!! That's a bit harsh. I have 5 kids and they have all been taught manners and respect towards people AND animals. My children respect my training methods and ask permission to handle the birds. And under no circumstance would they ever approach someone else's animal without permission. My oldest leaves for college next year to be a linguistic anthropologist. The next the following year to be a marine biologist. I DO NOT raise brats.

As for the original posters problem...what I do when I don't want people bothering my birds is I leave them off the tour of my house. I politely ask them to not enter their bird room. When I didn't have a bird room, I would block their progression towards my birds and tell them that my birds are still in training and bothering them could result in a bite. And if children are the issue...well for me I let my kids handle that lol. My kids are very protective of our birds

[Amandastander]

Wow thank you guys for all the interesting input. I currently do not have a birdsroom. And my 1 IRN was a rescue who came to me manhandled, and has trust issues, without a tail as it was plucked out by the previous idiot who had him. So my real issue is that every step I take forward with him, some one else comes and pushes him 3 steps back again. I don't mind people feeding and interacting with them. But my birds walk free in my house, and when they've been overstimulated or are tired, they go to their cages for private time, and Piper IS still training, regarding Buster the rescue, he only allows touch from my husband, if my guests talk to the birds and the bird show interest and approaches them, I don't have a problem with it, but if the birds are afraid and shies away, why on earth can't they use their brains and not try to elicit responses out of them, cause then they're breaking the trust they have towards other people as well.

[ellieelectrons]

Hi Amanda

I think you need to brief your visitors really well... and if they don't respond appropriately, then you need to keep them away from your bird using one of the means mentioned above.

I also can't stand it when people are mean to animals. I remember mini-lecturing somebody's kids once in a restaurant because they were tapping the glass on a fish tank.

Ellie.

[nalukaikamahine]

My personal observation on human behaviour is as follows:
the new age average joe blog and their children have little or no respect for animals.
one needs only to go to the zoo and observe their nauseating attitude to animals and people alike.
I can picture a kid pointing to a chicken and say "look mommy a cow!". whos to blame for this. prodding at and banging on cages to exact a response is downright disrespectful...this seems to be the general response by children and adult alike. My own birds are not exposed for being harrassed or stressed by firm control and restricted movement of visitors. personally i do not like to sell my birds as pets.

Yeah, that's pretty harsh...and I don't think that your observation covers much more than a small slice of ignorant people and their children.

You can't blame the child for a behavior that is supposed to be learned from their parents.

Lots of parents train their children to be gentle, and to not touch strange animals without the owners permission...I can't imagine there's a large chunk of people out there that say "Oh yeah, go for it little Jimmy! Just go run up to that strange *dog/bird/cat/rabbit/chicken* and give it a hug."

Most parents are a little more responsible than that.

But, all joking aside, OP if your visitors can't respect your wishes while they're in your home, then they shouldn't be welcomed back, especially if you've laid out the ground rules for them before.

[MissK]

Friends,

I think our group here on the forum is probably a skewed segment of the population, with regards to how we approach our animals, which I feel is an extension of how we approach other people. I'm sure the behaviour of the majority falls in between our very good example and the very bad examples being discussed. I work with the pubic, see lots of families, and I can definitely see the gross disrespect for others, including family members, that is being discussed. Of course we can properly lay the responsibility for children's (and subsequent adult's) bad behaviour at the feet of the parents. I think some of it is neglect or inattention or laziness, but as well a large part may simply be ignorance of how to train a child.

One particular family comes to mind. There are three very small, quite unruly, children and two very tense and unhappy parents. I'm sure they would change how their children disrespect and disobey them, if only they knew how. The entire group is miserable every time I see them. I have also seen the difference in my own family. My nephew was largely raised for several years by my mother, as his parents both worked. He is a model of good behaviour. His younger sister was raised only by her own parents, as they became more established and the mother worked less. She is like a wild animal. I acknowledge they are different and unique children, but I feel the different parenting styles have the most part to do with this behavioural difference.

My fellow forum users, some of the ideas presented may sound harsh to our select group, but remember we are not the "average" population. We are a subset of the population who are concerned about the treatment of (compared to us) helpless animals. We are the conscientious and the giving of self. If we were not, we would not have bothered to come here for the good of each other and the animals in our care. Rather than to have conflict amongst ourselves, would we not do better to go forth and enlighten others?

-MissK

[Skyes_crew]

You make some good points MissK. I guess I just always considered myself part of the average joe group and it struck a chord. But you are definitely correct in your assertion that we are all here to better the lives of our animals. There seems to be so many environmentalists, and animal activists around the world...but it will never be enough. Not because the cruel outweigh the compassionate...but because of the ignorance that comes from a lack of knowledge. In mans endeavor to create a super information highway, they failed to create communication. For most, they will only seek the information they are told to seek. When is the last time you (plural) got on your computer and typed in a random word, thought, animal, country, etc. and learned everything you could about it? Knowledge is key...and whether it seems useless or overabundant, it expands your mind. Gives you a new perspective. So the chord may have been struck, the comment unintentionally harmful, but ultimately narrow minded. To each his own though

[Fidgit_Green]

on the original question, i to believe that if your quests cannot control themselves enough to listen to you and what you want done about your own animals then something seriously need to be done about it, for the welfare of your pest mainly, but for yours aswell.
like the others have said, you best and easiest option is to put then away when these people come around.

i myself have had similar situations with my dog when i was training her. i did not like randon people to just come up and pet her, but is the person asked me to pet her then i was more that happy as long as they listened to me when i said how to pet her (as she had problems with her ears, so they had to not be touched).
but the biggest issue i had was trying to train my dog a specific way while i was living at my partners parents place, as anyone that has done any dog training will know that you will have alot of problems when you have several different people trying to get a dog to do the same but in several different ways. but the main thing that i couldnt understand with them, i wasnt even asking them to do something at all, i was asking them to literally do nothing, just ignore the dog and do nothing, but they couldnt even handle that.
i believe that same basis should be used for training a parrot as well, or any other pet really.
you need to have one main out line of how the training will go, and if any other person is to interact with that animal during the period that it is being train then they must follow the out line of the training (how the owner tells them to interact), otherwise you just confuse the animal and set the training back or even screw it up all together.
and if that person cannot follow the training out line, then they should not be having any interaction with that animal what so ever.

now luckily i have only had one random person try to touch Fidgit while i was out with him, ususally to avoid anyone trying, i will tell them straight away if they show interest in him, that he is not friendly and could bite them (not that he would bite, he would run to my opposite shoulder, or jump straight off me if they got to close). but i have found if i just tell people he might bite, then that usually discourages them trying.

and as for parents not teaching their children proper manners, i have always believed that if a couple are thinking of having kids, then they need to get a dog, if they cant train a dog to be a well behaved and loving family member then they shouldnt have kids.

i dont mean any offence by that last comment, and i apologize to anyone that has been offended by it.